Sunday, April 28, 2013

My addiction

Anybody who has known me for any length of time, knows that I have an addiction to FOOD.  I eat when I am happy... I eat when I am sad... I eat when I am angry... I eat when I am celebrating... I eat when I am depressed... I eat when I am anxious...  Just about the time that I think I have it under control, I am reminded that I don't.  It is my thorn in the flesh that I am sure I will have to wrestle with until Jesus comes back! 

Many who have addiction to things like drugs and alcohol are able to give them up and they can still function and be a better member of society.... however a food-addict cannot give up food all together without dying.  It takes a whole lot of self control and will power but by God's grace it can be done. 

Throughout the past 5+ years, I have lost the weight and reigned in the addiction but over the past year due to some medical issues and other things my weight has slowly crept back up.  Thankfully only to a point that clothes are getting a little snug.  I was smart enough throughout this process to get rid of clothes when I "out-grew" them... so my sizes are still much smaller than when I started.  I did this so that I couldn't go pull out a bigger size from the closet and add to the snowball.

Anyway after trying on a pair of shorts a couple of weeks ago that were at one point loose and are now snug, I decided that it was time again to retrain my brain (and tastebuds) to what I should be eating.  No dieting... just a reminder of what a proper... well balanced diet looks like... Lean meats, fruit, veggies, etc but out with the dairy, white grains, and processed sugars.  So far it has been working well and those shorts are getting less snug! And I am not craving the foods I shouldn't be eating!!!

Well what brings all this about... I was watching tv last night and thought how almost every commercial break has at least one food commercial if not a couple.  My tummy was somehow full and satisfied after dinner but while watching tv, it starts craving all the things that are advertised.  Foods that I would not normally eat anyway become a huge temptation.  Hmmm... does that mean I need to give up tv???  That is not going to happen but maybe muting on commercial breaks wouldn't be a bad thing.

His grace is enough

It has been a week of one attack after another.  Won't go into details but basically, it boils down to the enemy trying to steal, kill, and destroy my joy and contentment in where God has me right now.  Not looking back in the past or imagineing what I will be doing in the future but being content for today. 

I am normally a sensitive person who's heart gets involved rather quickly and I end up taking things very personally .... well the enemy has used this to his advantage this week to get my heart and mind off of what God has called me to do.  So much in fact that the battle even continued this morning where I didn't want to get out of bed to go to church... after some forceful coaxing I did but every excuse came up as to why I should just go back to bed.  Anyway... I did make it to church.  As I stood there during the worship, my heart was refreshed and reminded that the battle is not mine to fight... He has already won the war... He is bigger than anything the enemy can throw at me and despite my limited ability... with God all things are possible.

The message was out of Philippians 4:11-13 (where this blog got its inspiration).  Jesus is enough in my life.  I should not try to fight the battle on my own.  My contentment shouldn't be based on my circumstances or my feelings... it should be based on MY GOD!

When I finally leaned on Jesus and cast all that happened this week at His feet... yes I was tired from struggling in my own strength... but I realized that His grace is sufficient.

Monday, April 15, 2013

Praying for Boston

Vivid memories of hours spent outside in elementary school due to bomb threats.  As a child raised in the south I lived a sheltered "safe" life...never was there a real bomb or shooting incident.  Besides the occasional disruption to education, there were really no other big disturbances. 

While following the news today of the Boston Marathon terror... I can't help but think how times have changed.  It breaks my heart that what should be a "fun" celebratory day- Patriot's Day- in Boston turned into a horrific day that will go down in the history books.  What should have been a way to remember the 26 lives lost in Sandy Hook now is linked with more tragedy. We can all speculate who is behind this and the motive but ultimately... we need to fall on our faces before our divine Creator and ask for His healing... 

13 “When I shut up the heavens so that there is no rain, or command locusts to devour the land or send a plague among my people, 14 if my people, who are called by my name, will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven, and I will forgive their sin and will heal their land. 15 Now my eyes will be open and my ears attentive to the prayers offered in this place.  (2 Chronicles 7:13-15)

  • We need to pray peace and comfort for the families who lost loved ones day.
  • We need to pray healing for those injured.
  • We need to pray with thankfulness that others were not harmed in the bombs that didn't go off.
  • We ultimately need to pray for those behind this attack that they are caught and convicted.
Ironic huh that we are taking "In God we trust" and "God bless America" out of our daily lives but on days like today even the president of our country is encouraging us to pray for the victims. 

Thursday, April 11, 2013

Updated Needs for UGANDA

After spending two weeks in Uganda, I now have a better idea of what I am going to need long term.  I did some price checking and item searching while in Kampala.  Some things I can find for a reasonable price... some things can't be found or are so expensive that I won't be able to afford getting it. 
Several have requested an updated list so here it is...  (I do request that if you get items and plan on giving them to me when I am in NC in August... message me what you have so that I don't end up with 50 pumice stones and no baby wipes!)  LOL! 
Needs for UGANDA  (UPDATE:  Due to an overwhelming abundance of support, my luggage is filled to the brim from MKK!... see recent blog update...Thank you!!!)
  • coffee press
  • cream of wheat
  • coffee creamer (powder kind and flavored if possible)
  • stapler/staples
  • twin sheet set
  • chapstick/lip balm
  • deodorant (dove, suave, or secret)- preferably something with a light scent as mosquitos are attracted to strong scents of perfumes/deodorants/lotions
  • shampoo & conditioner
  • bug spray/mosquito repellant (liked Ben's brand - orange bottle with pump)
  • first aid kit
  • house shoes
  • almond butter
  • packages of tuna or salmon (if you find them on sale)
  • pumice stone
  • baby wipes/wet ones
  • hand sanitizer
  • bathroom rug
  • pilate cards
  • ziplocks (all sizes)
  • little packs of tissues
  • matches (not sure if I can travel with these???)
  • pancake mix
  • camp shower???
  • school supplies
SEEDS- organic/gmo free if at all possible
  • lettuce- red leaf/romaine
  • spinach
  • cilantro
  • squash/zucchini
  • cucumbers
  • basil
  • mint
  • tomatoes (small ones work best like cherry tomatoes)
  • sweet mini bell peppers
Other ways to help...
  • donate Delta skymiles
  • sponsor a child in the village to go to school (through ICN $35/month)
  • tax deductible gift to ITFM for living expenses (
  • service/medical teams are welcome to come and serve

When you ASSUME!

I will never forget the day riding home from middle school with my dad discussing a friend issue.  I had "assumed" something and dad asked me if I knew what it meant to "assume".  He then proceeded to tell me what it meant.  This event stands out in my mind because it was the first time I remember my dad ever saying a "curse" word!

Fast forward to today... a friend and I were out walking and talking... discussing some recent comments that have been made about this transition to Uganda.  The friend made the comment that most people probably "assume" that I am moving down to take a high paying administrator position.  When I started laughing, the friend made mention that maybe I need to clarify...

SO for all that are "assuming" that I am going down to Uganda, living a cushy, posh life and making BIG bucks, I would like to clarify...

  1. As of the end of May... I will be unemployed, uninsured, and no longer receiving a salary.
  2. When I move to Uganda in September... I will NOT be getting a paycheck.  (Nor do I have an agency paying for all of my traveling/moving expenses.)
  3. I will truly be relying FULLY on the LORD to provide each need.
  4. My "housing" in Uganda will eventually be the maternity ward of the clinic.  It has a working, flushing toilet and for that I am BLESSED. 
  5. Showers will be in a plastic wash tub in the clinic after hours... there is no shower in what is to be the maternity ward.
  6. My kitchen consists of a sink and a three burner camp stove... no refrigerator and no oven so I am making full use of that now!
Now... with all that said... I am not looking for sympathy or pity... that is NOT why I am posting this.  I am writing this to educate and share my heart.  It is not my intention to ever move somewhere to serve and live so far above the local people that they won't listen.  I am not going as a "vacation-ary"... but to be Christ's hands and feet!

Monday, April 1, 2013

Count your blessings

Sometimes things don't make sense in the moment but in hindsight you get 20/20 glances why it happened as it did.  Having flights delayed or cancelled is something that comes with travel.  There is not much I can do to fix this except for making the choice to not travel.  This is not an option for me... life is too short to not take risks.  You cannot live intentionally and be frozen in fear.  They are opposite!

Anyway now that my brain is a little less tired and tummy is satisfied, I decided to count my blessings because of the flight cancellations...

  1. made 2 new friends
  2. got to see monkeys
  3. life is safe because someone caught the problem with the brakes before a major issue happened
  4. divine appointments have happened on each flight today
  5. finally got to visit Canada due to rerouting
  6. because of the cancellations got food and flight vouchers so didn't have to spend money on food
  7. thankful for all of the friends that took care of all the details on MKK
In these kind of situations , I have the option to only look at the inconviences or I can look a the blessings/

A mix of emotions

Here I sit in Amsterdam airport again.  Thankfully the flight out of Entebbe left early last night and I got an "our apologies" voucher for food and air travel.  I am a bit tired and emotional... not sure if the emotions are just from the tiredness... the readiness to get home... my schedule being thrown off due to flight changes... or just missing the normality of life.  It could be a mixture of all of the above plus being really tired that I am not thinking straight.  It has been quite the emotional journey and it is FREEZING here!  I am blessed by the people that God has put in my path along the way to encourage and come alongside.  Kate and Pam, whom I met during the plane cancellation were so great to hang out with that it was sad to see them go in Amsterdam to catch their own flights.